Sunday, December 11, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Mum's advice and an unforgettable 'Thank you'
This entry to my blog has come as a result of my procrastination coming to an end, at least for the time being. My mother told me something yesterday which got me thinking; she said “you must find a girl before all the good ones are taken”. I didn’t want to sound rhetorical and say ‘good girls’ are becoming extinct over here. To a certain extent there is an ounce of truth in what I say because its challenging to find these girls. I wonder if all the ‘good girls’ have formed a club and are in hiding, away from being visible to guys like us. Since the fasting month ended most Muslims are getting married at a rate. This month alone, I have attended 1 wedding, and 2 more to go both falling on the same day. That’s the calendar as of today, which may likely change in the coming days.
Another friend from school got married last week making the wedding a reunion of sorts because I met some batch mates after nearly 7 years. That wedding was a nice chance to catch up on old times and recall our immature decisions while we were in school. People have moved on to better things and each one is trying to do something with his life.
In my earlier post, I mentioned about this girl I met at a wedding. But after some research, analysis and help from her cousin, things didn’t look like it would work out in my favour. Then I blamed myself for stepping out of my self-imposed policy of not pursuing women. It just doesn’t seem to work out when I actively get involved to get a woman. I did experience a phase where a woman liked me, and even gifted me a tie for my birthday; then to realize one day I have been removed from her Facebook friends’ list. The only thing I could think at that moment was who would do a thing like that?!? It simply goes against a rational thought process existing within all humans. I didn’t go to add her back as a friend, instead minded my own business. I don’t know the reason why she did that to me since I was nice to her throughout, but I suppose these things are better left alone.
Bottom line- I’m attracted to ‘not like other women’ or those slightly beyond my league, and attractive to complex and complicated women.
That previous introspection sums up volumes about my past and current social status. Therefore, I have decided to take a passive stance regarding this topic. No more pursuing, no more showing of interest towards the opposite gender, no more being distracted- but all this is easier said than done!! I just hope things would be easier for me to follow my own policy.
Leaving that aside, I have some good news to state on my community service activities. I was able to recommend 3 students for scholarships to my second home- Malaysia. It was a really tough task finding students who met the criteria. The scholarships were primarily for those who could not afford higher education due to financial constraints. From 46 students who sat for an English placement test 10 were chosen, out of which 3 of them having been nominated by me. I say, compared to the overall selection I have done pretty well to get a sizeable percentage from the final selection. But more has to done in order to help the needy. Also, this year for Zakath Fitra, we managed to distribute the largest amount of packs- 30 in total. We were able to more than double the amount of packs given last year.
I was really touched when one of the boys who got the scholarship came home to thank me. I had never before felt so lifted by a simple “thank you” in my life. I think it was mainly because his gratitude came from the heart, and for me to feel it spread through my soul is the belief of not expecting gratitude for what I did. I firmly believe education with the right kind of exposure can change perceptions, perspectives, attitudes and even a person’s life, as it has mine. It only begs an opportunity to anyone who wants to change their lives; and I want to be that person who will be able to provide that opportunity.
In other news, people have begun to ask me when I will be getting married. This series of questions have been accelerating for some time now, and don’t know for how long I can act a little dodgy. For the time being a coy smile does it with some words like “not yet” or “still working on it”. But don’t you hate it when some people become insistent and want to solve it for you?!?
So, to all the good girls out there, pleases put your hands up!!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Got so many things to say!!
Due to me not blogging for a long time, there are quite a number of things I have to say. Note to self- your level of procrastinating is deplorable, and you should be shot!! There's something about scolding myself which gives me a light boost. I want to be my own critic and over the years it has worked out quite well. It works a bit like this; I review most of the things I do over the week or month and try to come to a conclusion if its what I should've done. Anyway, since I got to say a lot I will do so by giving topics.
Itchy feelings
I had this sore throat and stomach pain; so, went to the doctor as usual and took a prescription. After taking the medicine, next day I started to itch on my back. The itching was like someone pricking you with pins. I didn't pay it much attention and instead used some prickly-heat powder as a temporary solution. It was not helping with the itch and days later I went again to my family doctor. As he read out the drugs given to me before, I realised by the names that something was wrong. I had not got a proper medicine from the pharmacy!! Instead of the correct medicine I had been given a double dose of another drug.
After a blood test (to confirm it wasn't dengue) and another meeting with my doctor (this time taking all my medicine for him to inspect) at which time he called and blasted the pharmacist, I was reassured the itch would "just go away". After that episode, I went to the pharmacy and blasted the pharmacist again, which lead to the manager refunding my money. It was my first act as a disgusted customer that went quite well. My doctor was wrong about the itch, hence I went to consult a dermatologist who game a cream and a soap-free wash. Now, thank God, the itch is not there!!
The plan to jump ship
The account I'm working for is not doing that good in terms of profitability and earnings. Last year, the account ended with a loss and despite it everyone got a 10% increment with a month's bonus. I didn't get all of that because I was still on my 6 month probation. This year too, it looks like we will end with a loss. So much for my upward mobility, huh?!? Its very obvious that promotions would definitely not come my way while in this business unit. The most bewildering thing is, how did managers of my business unit let losses accumulate year after year?! And didn't they see signs of the business going south?
So...the plan is pretty simple really. Wait until I complete a year and then jump to somewhere good. Maybe to another company altogether or to another division of the same company. I have begun to make plans slowly by asking around and trying to get connections of important people for this task. 'What you know' will bring you to some extent in your career, but 'whom you know' can really make it zoom to the top.
A deliberate invitation
I got news from MB that one of out mutual friends were getting married after having returned to SL. I had lost touch with this chap, so I called his house and spoke to him in a 'kinda of' harsh way about not telling me about his wedding. At this stage, I was not expecting to be invited for the wedding. My policy is this- if you invite me I will definitely come; if you don't, then no worries. I think he decided to invite me out of sheer embarrassment in the way I made him feel- period. If not, why on earth would someone post a wedding invitation in SL?! With an unreliable postal service, any man posting a wedding invitation must be off his rocker.
Anyway, putting all that aside, I went for the Nikah (though I got the invite on the eve of the function) and the Waleema. Here's the best part- all of my other friends had been invited for dinner at his house after the nikah and I wasn't. In accordance with my policy I didn't go to the dinner even though my friends told me to come.
It looks like a lot of friends are set to get hitched this year. And also the question of "when is your wedding?" will be asked by a million people, no doubt about that. I just hope I can make it through this year without losing my cool every time someone asks me that.
Malay kahwin (wedding)
I was invited to a wedding of a relative in 5 star style so the whole family attended 'all dressed up'. To me, there was a lot of extravagance in the wedding- a band, liquor (totally haram), professional dancers (Astaghfirullah!!), dancing floor etc. I was sad to see how our Malays were just spending money without knowing its true value. I was invited from the groom's side at the last minute because I think some people cancelled. Yes, its true how pathetic it has become because I get invited only if someone rejects an invite. An 'ouch' type of scenario indeed!!
On the other hand, there were a lot of people I knew at the wedding- aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, work colleagues, guys from my school alumni and blah blah blah. I was introduced a girl by a friend, who was her cousin; and I must say she is quite pretty. I came back home and somewhat did a stalking operation of her on facebook. I know what your thinking, but I couldn't help it. Alas, he profile can be viewed only by friends!! The only upside for me was seeing a lot of women, which was a good change compared to my boring routine. I'm quite keen to find out about this girl since my friend informed that her cousin is single. I wondered if it was possible for women these days to be single?!? Guess I was wrong. My assumption through past experience- every girl you think you like is most likely taken, and to a great extent this has turned out to be true.
Well, I suppose that's it. But let's see how this story develops, and I will call her 'Wedding Girl' (since I met her at a wedding, and obviously can't use her name in my blog). I have not thought of an approach in this regard- whether to be proactive or passive. I just told my friend to put in a good word for me with her cousin, so lets see what happens...
Itchy feelings
I had this sore throat and stomach pain; so, went to the doctor as usual and took a prescription. After taking the medicine, next day I started to itch on my back. The itching was like someone pricking you with pins. I didn't pay it much attention and instead used some prickly-heat powder as a temporary solution. It was not helping with the itch and days later I went again to my family doctor. As he read out the drugs given to me before, I realised by the names that something was wrong. I had not got a proper medicine from the pharmacy!! Instead of the correct medicine I had been given a double dose of another drug.
After a blood test (to confirm it wasn't dengue) and another meeting with my doctor (this time taking all my medicine for him to inspect) at which time he called and blasted the pharmacist, I was reassured the itch would "just go away". After that episode, I went to the pharmacy and blasted the pharmacist again, which lead to the manager refunding my money. It was my first act as a disgusted customer that went quite well. My doctor was wrong about the itch, hence I went to consult a dermatologist who game a cream and a soap-free wash. Now, thank God, the itch is not there!!
The plan to jump ship
The account I'm working for is not doing that good in terms of profitability and earnings. Last year, the account ended with a loss and despite it everyone got a 10% increment with a month's bonus. I didn't get all of that because I was still on my 6 month probation. This year too, it looks like we will end with a loss. So much for my upward mobility, huh?!? Its very obvious that promotions would definitely not come my way while in this business unit. The most bewildering thing is, how did managers of my business unit let losses accumulate year after year?! And didn't they see signs of the business going south?
So...the plan is pretty simple really. Wait until I complete a year and then jump to somewhere good. Maybe to another company altogether or to another division of the same company. I have begun to make plans slowly by asking around and trying to get connections of important people for this task. 'What you know' will bring you to some extent in your career, but 'whom you know' can really make it zoom to the top.
A deliberate invitation
I got news from MB that one of out mutual friends were getting married after having returned to SL. I had lost touch with this chap, so I called his house and spoke to him in a 'kinda of' harsh way about not telling me about his wedding. At this stage, I was not expecting to be invited for the wedding. My policy is this- if you invite me I will definitely come; if you don't, then no worries. I think he decided to invite me out of sheer embarrassment in the way I made him feel- period. If not, why on earth would someone post a wedding invitation in SL?! With an unreliable postal service, any man posting a wedding invitation must be off his rocker.
Anyway, putting all that aside, I went for the Nikah (though I got the invite on the eve of the function) and the Waleema. Here's the best part- all of my other friends had been invited for dinner at his house after the nikah and I wasn't. In accordance with my policy I didn't go to the dinner even though my friends told me to come.
It looks like a lot of friends are set to get hitched this year. And also the question of "when is your wedding?" will be asked by a million people, no doubt about that. I just hope I can make it through this year without losing my cool every time someone asks me that.
Malay kahwin (wedding)
I was invited to a wedding of a relative in 5 star style so the whole family attended 'all dressed up'. To me, there was a lot of extravagance in the wedding- a band, liquor (totally haram), professional dancers (Astaghfirullah!!), dancing floor etc. I was sad to see how our Malays were just spending money without knowing its true value. I was invited from the groom's side at the last minute because I think some people cancelled. Yes, its true how pathetic it has become because I get invited only if someone rejects an invite. An 'ouch' type of scenario indeed!!
On the other hand, there were a lot of people I knew at the wedding- aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, work colleagues, guys from my school alumni and blah blah blah. I was introduced a girl by a friend, who was her cousin; and I must say she is quite pretty. I came back home and somewhat did a stalking operation of her on facebook. I know what your thinking, but I couldn't help it. Alas, he profile can be viewed only by friends!! The only upside for me was seeing a lot of women, which was a good change compared to my boring routine. I'm quite keen to find out about this girl since my friend informed that her cousin is single. I wondered if it was possible for women these days to be single?!? Guess I was wrong. My assumption through past experience- every girl you think you like is most likely taken, and to a great extent this has turned out to be true.
Well, I suppose that's it. But let's see how this story develops, and I will call her 'Wedding Girl' (since I met her at a wedding, and obviously can't use her name in my blog). I have not thought of an approach in this regard- whether to be proactive or passive. I just told my friend to put in a good word for me with her cousin, so lets see what happens...
Sunday, June 12, 2011
So...what's happening with you?!?
The sentence "what's happening with you?" is making me feel slightly out of my comfort zone all because it deals with your status- hitched, engaged, or going to marry. This is the time where all your friends are jumping on to the marriage wagon, and facebook is flooded with wedding pics. To make things more aggravating my friends parents are asking the same question too, but in this case questions are more probing; its like they want to know the reason why I'm still single. Question mentioned before may use many synonyms, but the intended meaning is the same.
It's the same for MB (Mamma's Boy) as well since his sister will get married end of this year. Last week at his cousins wedding both his uncle and dad had sat with him at the same table talking about marriage for over an hour. It his words that entire hour was "very awkward" because girls or women were never a topic which was discussed before. Every time he meets some relatives they always say without failing "you're next!!" Obviously, MB will get married and have kids even before I even think about marriage. In my case things are not that simple either.
It has been 7 months since I started working, and I have a long way to go. Marriage is a huge commitment and it takes a lot of courage to begin with. At this point in time I'm in no place to take on responsibility of another since my own issues remain unresolved. I know that you cant wait for everything to fall in place to get married. But having a decent paycheck that could support 2 people would surely help. It is like demand being incomplete without the ability to pay for you want.
Other matter is, finding a good girl is so hard these days!! Looks like all the 'good' women are taken. I wonder if there are women out there saying "shit... where have all the good men gone to?" and feeling appalled with the current situation. Wouldn't it be great if those girls and guys like me could meet up?!
I could only wonder...
It's the same for MB (Mamma's Boy) as well since his sister will get married end of this year. Last week at his cousins wedding both his uncle and dad had sat with him at the same table talking about marriage for over an hour. It his words that entire hour was "very awkward" because girls or women were never a topic which was discussed before. Every time he meets some relatives they always say without failing "you're next!!" Obviously, MB will get married and have kids even before I even think about marriage. In my case things are not that simple either.
It has been 7 months since I started working, and I have a long way to go. Marriage is a huge commitment and it takes a lot of courage to begin with. At this point in time I'm in no place to take on responsibility of another since my own issues remain unresolved. I know that you cant wait for everything to fall in place to get married. But having a decent paycheck that could support 2 people would surely help. It is like demand being incomplete without the ability to pay for you want.
Other matter is, finding a good girl is so hard these days!! Looks like all the 'good' women are taken. I wonder if there are women out there saying "shit... where have all the good men gone to?" and feeling appalled with the current situation. Wouldn't it be great if those girls and guys like me could meet up?!
I could only wonder...
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Bradby 2011- The Shield that was never Royal's
The Royal sports complex was the epicentre of school's rugby today with the Bradby 2nd leg to be played in the evening. Having a front row seat was beyond exciting because its far removed from the congestion experienced in the standing tiers on the other side of the ground. Incidentally, the Bradby was my first match of the season (after this it will be the last) as a live spectator. Previous Royal matches had to be sacrificed due to study commitments with classes falling on weekends.
In a nutshell, nothing went Royal's way which to many was quite hard to handle. Here is a team that beat Trinity in Kandy 2 weeks ago when branded as 'under dogs', not to mention getting off to a flying start from the kickoff. Early in the game Royal fluffed 2 penalty kicks (both within kicking range), which to me was not a good sign. The game plan would be to apply early pressure on the rival team and increase the 8 point lead from the 1st leg. Instead, all I saw was Trinity calling the shots and Royal being more reactive as opposed to playing offensive. Even in offensive play after the 3rd or 4th phase Royal was unable to maintain possession of the ball which stalled momentum considerably. Credit is due to Trinity forwards who kept the Royal forwards in check all the time without giving them any room to break through their defenses. To me, the Trinity captain stood out both in attack and defense; he was able to draw at least 2 defenders every time when engaging the Royal defense. This enabled Trinity to capitalise greatly in having extra men to run the ball. Royal's game plan of playing with their forwards hardly worked in their favour because each time the forwards went for hits they were running into brick walls.
The Trinity three-quarters were a scintillating lot with amazing running displays; every time the backs made a move they were able to punch holes in the Royal defense. Trinity backs had powerful running displays, and were resolute in their defense as well. In the entire match, I would have seen the Royal backs work their line not more than 10 times. And there were moments when the backs had no clue what to do after getting the ball. Better yet, the Royal forwards walk up to line-outs and jump for the ball (and mind you, its something not even the All Black do) without being able to reclaim it. Losing to Trinity in Colombo gives an impression that Royal's victory up in Kandy was a stroke of luck- like Royal were the 'lucky' team that day. The 40-5 margin speaks volumes of how much Trinity has worked towards winning the Bradby after the 32-25 loss 2 weeks prior to this.
I fear the Royal team needs to re-think its strategy in many ways. In all honesty, it was a heart breaking day to be a Royal supporter, but this all part and parcel of life. I hope others won't be too critical in their evaluation of today's match- after all they are still school boys. I refuse to single out any Royal player for not being up to par, since rugby is a team game, and both victory and defeat needs to be absorbed by every player of the team equally. I hope the Royal team will take this defeat constructively and move on, because the league title is still within reach- maybe all is not lost, not yet anyway.
On the brighter side (apart from having to see Royal lose), the stands were packed with people not to mention the female supporters of both schools. Its nice to see ladies coming to watch a rugby match!! I need to get me one of them ladies' (like they are displayed in shops and are up for sale)- LOL! Also, I get a complimentary souvenir since I happened to be a past editor of the Bradby souvenir, not to forget my name being included in it as well. I suppose for me its a consolation end of the day. Hats off to Trinity because they were worthy winners today and I'm sure the entire team is above cloud 9 at this moment.
In a nutshell, nothing went Royal's way which to many was quite hard to handle. Here is a team that beat Trinity in Kandy 2 weeks ago when branded as 'under dogs', not to mention getting off to a flying start from the kickoff. Early in the game Royal fluffed 2 penalty kicks (both within kicking range), which to me was not a good sign. The game plan would be to apply early pressure on the rival team and increase the 8 point lead from the 1st leg. Instead, all I saw was Trinity calling the shots and Royal being more reactive as opposed to playing offensive. Even in offensive play after the 3rd or 4th phase Royal was unable to maintain possession of the ball which stalled momentum considerably. Credit is due to Trinity forwards who kept the Royal forwards in check all the time without giving them any room to break through their defenses. To me, the Trinity captain stood out both in attack and defense; he was able to draw at least 2 defenders every time when engaging the Royal defense. This enabled Trinity to capitalise greatly in having extra men to run the ball. Royal's game plan of playing with their forwards hardly worked in their favour because each time the forwards went for hits they were running into brick walls.
The Trinity three-quarters were a scintillating lot with amazing running displays; every time the backs made a move they were able to punch holes in the Royal defense. Trinity backs had powerful running displays, and were resolute in their defense as well. In the entire match, I would have seen the Royal backs work their line not more than 10 times. And there were moments when the backs had no clue what to do after getting the ball. Better yet, the Royal forwards walk up to line-outs and jump for the ball (and mind you, its something not even the All Black do) without being able to reclaim it. Losing to Trinity in Colombo gives an impression that Royal's victory up in Kandy was a stroke of luck- like Royal were the 'lucky' team that day. The 40-5 margin speaks volumes of how much Trinity has worked towards winning the Bradby after the 32-25 loss 2 weeks prior to this.
I fear the Royal team needs to re-think its strategy in many ways. In all honesty, it was a heart breaking day to be a Royal supporter, but this all part and parcel of life. I hope others won't be too critical in their evaluation of today's match- after all they are still school boys. I refuse to single out any Royal player for not being up to par, since rugby is a team game, and both victory and defeat needs to be absorbed by every player of the team equally. I hope the Royal team will take this defeat constructively and move on, because the league title is still within reach- maybe all is not lost, not yet anyway.
On the brighter side (apart from having to see Royal lose), the stands were packed with people not to mention the female supporters of both schools. Its nice to see ladies coming to watch a rugby match!! I need to get me one of them ladies' (like they are displayed in shops and are up for sale)- LOL! Also, I get a complimentary souvenir since I happened to be a past editor of the Bradby souvenir, not to forget my name being included in it as well. I suppose for me its a consolation end of the day. Hats off to Trinity because they were worthy winners today and I'm sure the entire team is above cloud 9 at this moment.
Tuesday, June 07, 2011
6 Months After...
Well, for starters the title of this post can very well be used for a movie. It would resonate a romantic/comedic chord with people who hear it. It has been ages sine my last post, and blogging became a victim of pressure faced through work and professional studies. Looking ahead, I'm happy to get back to blogging and write my thoughts of a virtual diary. One interesting thing I noticed is that my number of followers have grown to 7!! I think a round of applause and a pat on the back should do it for me.
Today, I sat for an exam after 2 years since leaving uni, that too, my first professional exam. Exams of this nature are quite perplexing because you can't gauge your status before doing the paper. Back in uni before sitting for final exams I would always know where I stood, and how much I needed to score to get an A or A-. I hate to say it but not having carry marks gives you a certain level of uncertainty and insecurity. Surprisingly, I didn't feel an intense level of pressure as I used to when sitting for uni exams. Maybe it was because I didn't have a much content to memorize since the exam was based on a case.
I did feel slightly nauseous as always before sitting for exams; its something that I have been unsuccessful in overcoming. While getting ready to leave home I felt as if time had drifted back to Malaysia. All the routines I used to do back then are still vividly encapsulated within me. It's abnormally satisfying to recall certain moments of your life that made life worth living. Sitting for exams in Malaysia reinforced a belief that I could excel academically, while previously I couldn't. It was my main driver and motivator through uni, no doubt about that!!
Now back to Sri Lanka. Traveling a long way to the exam venue is not something I relish. Its to do a lot with taking 10 minutes to reach CAC in uni. Oh well... I suppose you can't have it all. En route to the exam my bus driver violated traffic rules and got a ticket as well. Yes folks, this only happens in Lanka!! I almost forgot- before leaving home it started to rain, and that reminded me of how people could make it to CAC from the hostels without getting wet. In a way, today was rather nostalgic with sprinkles of pre-exam jitters. The SLECC seemed quite a good venue to host an exam, but not so grand as the CAC, and halfway through the exam there was a power cut. And you have another 'only in Sri Lanka' moment (drum roll please)!! My right hand still hurts from all the writing because its just been so long since I wrote that much.
I have done 2 subjects and got another 2 to go which are only assignment submissions due in September. My only hope is I make through these two subjects since my exam record is still intact without any failures.
So...here's looking to get back to blogging then.
Today, I sat for an exam after 2 years since leaving uni, that too, my first professional exam. Exams of this nature are quite perplexing because you can't gauge your status before doing the paper. Back in uni before sitting for final exams I would always know where I stood, and how much I needed to score to get an A or A-. I hate to say it but not having carry marks gives you a certain level of uncertainty and insecurity. Surprisingly, I didn't feel an intense level of pressure as I used to when sitting for uni exams. Maybe it was because I didn't have a much content to memorize since the exam was based on a case.
I did feel slightly nauseous as always before sitting for exams; its something that I have been unsuccessful in overcoming. While getting ready to leave home I felt as if time had drifted back to Malaysia. All the routines I used to do back then are still vividly encapsulated within me. It's abnormally satisfying to recall certain moments of your life that made life worth living. Sitting for exams in Malaysia reinforced a belief that I could excel academically, while previously I couldn't. It was my main driver and motivator through uni, no doubt about that!!
Now back to Sri Lanka. Traveling a long way to the exam venue is not something I relish. Its to do a lot with taking 10 minutes to reach CAC in uni. Oh well... I suppose you can't have it all. En route to the exam my bus driver violated traffic rules and got a ticket as well. Yes folks, this only happens in Lanka!! I almost forgot- before leaving home it started to rain, and that reminded me of how people could make it to CAC from the hostels without getting wet. In a way, today was rather nostalgic with sprinkles of pre-exam jitters. The SLECC seemed quite a good venue to host an exam, but not so grand as the CAC, and halfway through the exam there was a power cut. And you have another 'only in Sri Lanka' moment (drum roll please)!! My right hand still hurts from all the writing because its just been so long since I wrote that much.
I have done 2 subjects and got another 2 to go which are only assignment submissions due in September. My only hope is I make through these two subjects since my exam record is still intact without any failures.
So...here's looking to get back to blogging then.
Sunday, April 03, 2011
Self-absorbing Bus Rides & Elusiveness of Time
Last week was quite eventful and not to mention very remorseful to me. One incident being a friend's brother dying in a high speed car crash while driving at 170 kmph along with 5 others on a windy road. This happened while going down south, and I'm told the driver and everyone else were under the influence of alcohol. Ripping at such lightening speeds the driver missed a turn and rammed right into a coconut tree which snapped in two on impact, and after that the car landed in a stream nearby. It had taken area residents about 45 min to get all the people out of the car; by looking at photos of the car it was totally smashed. The car was a brand new Benz S350 owned by the driver who happened to have a rich businessman dad. It was a sad state of affairs, but every action has its own equal and opposite reaction.
Last Saturday while having a small bite to eat near a road side shop before classes I noticed a couple under a shady tree having a carefree time. The shop I was in is near the beach situated on Marine Drive -a stretch of coastal road connecting a few important areas of Colombo, and famous for reckless driving- with a satisfactory view of the sea. If you cross the railway tracks the beach is only a few feet away. While munching on my snacks I observed (something I do very well) the behaviour and body language of the couple coming to a conclusion that both were in their own world oblivious to everything around them. At the same time I wondered what could they be talking about for such a long time?? And how do you sustain such a scenario? I guess I would never understand it until I'm in that situation too. The more I think relationship's are not for me, the more external factors seem to reinforce that theory!!
On a physical note, my right wrist is giving me some serious pain due to some strained veins. I have nothing else but to thank my office computer and mouse for this. I wonder if there are other factors to this also?! Basically, I cant rest my hand on a flat surface because the veins running near my wrist start to pain. The pain travels up my arm a little and dies away naturally, but the initial pain is somewhat unbearable. It's also the same when I write something. Under doctor's orders I've been told to wear a wrist guard accompanied by a gel I have to apply before wearing it. I just hope it gets better soon since my gym sessions are affected by this; not going to gym is a precaution I'm taking because the risks and consequences will be greater if there's an injury.
Going in the bus is quite enjoyable in the sense that you get to think and ponder about different things. I wish I had a car but since don't its better to enjoy what I already have. Plus, you get to see a wide cross-section of society in the many buses. I just look and observe at the various people in the bus and what they do; to me it's interesting in a quirky way.
So... there you are, at the moment I'm into observing people. Weird right?!?
Last Saturday while having a small bite to eat near a road side shop before classes I noticed a couple under a shady tree having a carefree time. The shop I was in is near the beach situated on Marine Drive -a stretch of coastal road connecting a few important areas of Colombo, and famous for reckless driving- with a satisfactory view of the sea. If you cross the railway tracks the beach is only a few feet away. While munching on my snacks I observed (something I do very well) the behaviour and body language of the couple coming to a conclusion that both were in their own world oblivious to everything around them. At the same time I wondered what could they be talking about for such a long time?? And how do you sustain such a scenario? I guess I would never understand it until I'm in that situation too. The more I think relationship's are not for me, the more external factors seem to reinforce that theory!!
On a physical note, my right wrist is giving me some serious pain due to some strained veins. I have nothing else but to thank my office computer and mouse for this. I wonder if there are other factors to this also?! Basically, I cant rest my hand on a flat surface because the veins running near my wrist start to pain. The pain travels up my arm a little and dies away naturally, but the initial pain is somewhat unbearable. It's also the same when I write something. Under doctor's orders I've been told to wear a wrist guard accompanied by a gel I have to apply before wearing it. I just hope it gets better soon since my gym sessions are affected by this; not going to gym is a precaution I'm taking because the risks and consequences will be greater if there's an injury.
Going in the bus is quite enjoyable in the sense that you get to think and ponder about different things. I wish I had a car but since don't its better to enjoy what I already have. Plus, you get to see a wide cross-section of society in the many buses. I just look and observe at the various people in the bus and what they do; to me it's interesting in a quirky way.
So... there you are, at the moment I'm into observing people. Weird right?!?
Sunday, March 20, 2011
When its too late to make things right...
Its been awhile since I saw this screen, but I thought I should post something since I have some free time. Working 5 days a week and going for classes in the weekends are really sapping all of my energy, and not to mention time. I hardly do anything else than go to classes. Note to self- don't enroll for 4 subjects next time because it will really screw you. I don't mean that in a bad or detrimental way; its just that time management goes out the window. I honestly don't even have time for myself let alone others!! I underestimated about assignments for CIM, and it seems much harder. But I suppose that will make you work even harder to meet those standards and in the process have better exposure.
Things at home are quite not what I want it to be. Dad is losing control of my brother who although going to be 22 this year hardly acts his age. To make things worse mum does all the work and excuses him from almost all chores- some which I did at a very young age. Responsibility is something very lacking in him, and God knows how he will fix it. Whenever I ask him about something related to the house all he says is "I don't know". So, there is no point in asking him about anything!! On the other side, he's religious and can focus on anything if he wants to, but lacks practicality. I blame both my parents for how he has been brought up. Period.
Have you know a person studying for an exam not knowing when the exam will be held?!? Your guess is as good as mine..
I think when your the elder son parents seem to put more effort into training you in things they think are important. I remember running errands for mum since the time I was about 6 years old; that's because I was the other guy after dad. I didn't complain about it (maybe sometimes when I realised my brother was doing nothing) too much and instead did what I was told. In retrospect I liked being given responsibility because for some reason it made me feel good. I don't know if its in my genetics or not, but its a part of me. When it comes to the second son I think parents take it a bit easy. This is very relative depending on each family.
As a result of this some important things are still done by my parents and myself. I've tried to explain to him so many times but it has failed. He suddenly turns aggressive and verbally lashes out at people. He can't take criticism properly and always has something to say as an excuse; even recalling trivial incidents of the past which are quite insignificant to support his arguments. Obviously, it causes a lot of stress to both mum and dad because assurance of completing a task assigned to my brother is hardly ever guaranteed. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but at least I get the job done.
Halfway through school he changed tremendously and even changed his set of friends. Now, he is left with only a handful of people. There is this tendency where he can't tolerate people and their different behaviours. As a consequence, he would not associate such people even those who have been his school friends for a long time. People have said my brother and I are worlds apart. I admit, its very true. It has come to an extent where people known to both of us have asked me "what's wrong with your bro?" People in this list include mutual friends, uncles, aunties and other acquaintances.
To be very frank we don't even have a relationship that other siblings have with each other. Most of the time we end up fighting over some useless issue and get worked up over nothing. At times I'm a little envious of people who have good relationships with their brothers and sisters. Hey, I'm human after all ok!! To be really honest... we hardly ever talk to each other though living under the same roof. Sad as it may sound its the truth and I can't ignore it.
I've tried to reach out to him so many times and have failed in each attempt. Now, I don't want to try anymore. If it was a machine things would have ended much better, but how will it turn out for my brother?!?
Things at home are quite not what I want it to be. Dad is losing control of my brother who although going to be 22 this year hardly acts his age. To make things worse mum does all the work and excuses him from almost all chores- some which I did at a very young age. Responsibility is something very lacking in him, and God knows how he will fix it. Whenever I ask him about something related to the house all he says is "I don't know". So, there is no point in asking him about anything!! On the other side, he's religious and can focus on anything if he wants to, but lacks practicality. I blame both my parents for how he has been brought up. Period.
Have you know a person studying for an exam not knowing when the exam will be held?!? Your guess is as good as mine..
I think when your the elder son parents seem to put more effort into training you in things they think are important. I remember running errands for mum since the time I was about 6 years old; that's because I was the other guy after dad. I didn't complain about it (maybe sometimes when I realised my brother was doing nothing) too much and instead did what I was told. In retrospect I liked being given responsibility because for some reason it made me feel good. I don't know if its in my genetics or not, but its a part of me. When it comes to the second son I think parents take it a bit easy. This is very relative depending on each family.
As a result of this some important things are still done by my parents and myself. I've tried to explain to him so many times but it has failed. He suddenly turns aggressive and verbally lashes out at people. He can't take criticism properly and always has something to say as an excuse; even recalling trivial incidents of the past which are quite insignificant to support his arguments. Obviously, it causes a lot of stress to both mum and dad because assurance of completing a task assigned to my brother is hardly ever guaranteed. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but at least I get the job done.
Halfway through school he changed tremendously and even changed his set of friends. Now, he is left with only a handful of people. There is this tendency where he can't tolerate people and their different behaviours. As a consequence, he would not associate such people even those who have been his school friends for a long time. People have said my brother and I are worlds apart. I admit, its very true. It has come to an extent where people known to both of us have asked me "what's wrong with your bro?" People in this list include mutual friends, uncles, aunties and other acquaintances.
To be very frank we don't even have a relationship that other siblings have with each other. Most of the time we end up fighting over some useless issue and get worked up over nothing. At times I'm a little envious of people who have good relationships with their brothers and sisters. Hey, I'm human after all ok!! To be really honest... we hardly ever talk to each other though living under the same roof. Sad as it may sound its the truth and I can't ignore it.
I've tried to reach out to him so many times and have failed in each attempt. Now, I don't want to try anymore. If it was a machine things would have ended much better, but how will it turn out for my brother?!?
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Collage Thoughts
There I was on a Friday evening after work with some colleagues around a table having a few drinks (in my case it was non-alcoholic). Work is starting to grow on me and the team is opening up to me gradually. I like this bunch of people, who are very informal even in formal settings. I might have to rethink my office policy on keeping things plainly official; because most things in life are shades of grey. The best in all of this is the bonding you get with your team, and its a good thing mine is quite small. My team is a total of 13 people (nothing unlucky about it) out of which 7 were accounted for around the table, which constitutes a majority.
I heard stories about how things were done about 5 years earlier, the hardships they went through, what's going wrong at office now, and so much more. But I must say this, though on the outside these chaps may not look suave, posh or even classy, they all have good hearts and intentions. It was evident from the way they spoke. I feel like I've found a team who will stick it out through thick and thin- come what may!! And I in turn plan not to disappoint and live up to expectations.
It seems that all of my friends are getting hitched one after the other like a chain of dominoes. Just a few weeks back I spoke to a friend who returned from abroad in order to start back home. During the conversation I joked about how he should get married soon; lo and behold he's getting engaged this Sunday. A string of others are planning to follow suit very soon. When I heard the news I was very happy for the chap who said "I was not expecting to get married either, but everything seemed to fit". I wonder how you arrive at the correct "fit"?
Its funny because first thing I told him after hearing the engagement was- "you bastard!!" It was slightly rhetorical and mostly a great deal of astonishment and slight shock. I mean, it was like a bolt of lightening- good think it doesn't strike the same place twice!! Finding someone is definitely a blessing, and for those who have I say "well done". Not to sound pessimistic, but this thought always comes to my mind- 'would I find that person who's the correct fit'? To start with, I don't even want to even start thinking about this because it has too many variables. At the moment, its best that I focus solely on my career, but even that's easier said than done.
Going down memory lane, my last highly emotional moment occurred at KL Sentral before coming home for good. I still remember that day to a great deal. Its like I wished to stall time much as I pleased, and like that was so realistic. By the end of it, I rushed to the washroom to wash my face because it was not going to act according to my rational thought process. Plus, I didn't want people to see me with near teary eyes, which looks weird on any man. Since that day I have grown slightly wiser in my approach; promising that I would never allow myself to end up in a situation such as this ever again.
I'm mature enough to understand that behind every action or occurrence there lies a fundamental reason or rationale. Its just that at times everything is so blurred that you can hardly see anything clearly.
I have so much to write, and why on earth is the time flying so fast!!
To my friend Z- I wish you a happy and beautiful married life, and may Allah bless you!!
I heard stories about how things were done about 5 years earlier, the hardships they went through, what's going wrong at office now, and so much more. But I must say this, though on the outside these chaps may not look suave, posh or even classy, they all have good hearts and intentions. It was evident from the way they spoke. I feel like I've found a team who will stick it out through thick and thin- come what may!! And I in turn plan not to disappoint and live up to expectations.
It seems that all of my friends are getting hitched one after the other like a chain of dominoes. Just a few weeks back I spoke to a friend who returned from abroad in order to start back home. During the conversation I joked about how he should get married soon; lo and behold he's getting engaged this Sunday. A string of others are planning to follow suit very soon. When I heard the news I was very happy for the chap who said "I was not expecting to get married either, but everything seemed to fit". I wonder how you arrive at the correct "fit"?
Its funny because first thing I told him after hearing the engagement was- "you bastard!!" It was slightly rhetorical and mostly a great deal of astonishment and slight shock. I mean, it was like a bolt of lightening- good think it doesn't strike the same place twice!! Finding someone is definitely a blessing, and for those who have I say "well done". Not to sound pessimistic, but this thought always comes to my mind- 'would I find that person who's the correct fit'? To start with, I don't even want to even start thinking about this because it has too many variables. At the moment, its best that I focus solely on my career, but even that's easier said than done.
Going down memory lane, my last highly emotional moment occurred at KL Sentral before coming home for good. I still remember that day to a great deal. Its like I wished to stall time much as I pleased, and like that was so realistic. By the end of it, I rushed to the washroom to wash my face because it was not going to act according to my rational thought process. Plus, I didn't want people to see me with near teary eyes, which looks weird on any man. Since that day I have grown slightly wiser in my approach; promising that I would never allow myself to end up in a situation such as this ever again.
I'm mature enough to understand that behind every action or occurrence there lies a fundamental reason or rationale. Its just that at times everything is so blurred that you can hardly see anything clearly.
I have so much to write, and why on earth is the time flying so fast!!
To my friend Z- I wish you a happy and beautiful married life, and may Allah bless you!!
Monday, January 24, 2011
To better beginnings..
I started the new year on a very dull, yet significant note. I enrolled myself to do CIM as a professional qualification for the sake of career development. I thought it was about time I started doing it since these qualifications matter. Being exempted from the first stage was quite heartening, not to mention having a small cloud of insecurity hanging above my head. That insecurity came about from the unknown of what will come my way. Professional exams are not like academic degrees where you can just write anything and expect to get marks for it; if that is so, then no point doing it either. I realised from my first class itself that things were different- so it should be!!
I like going back to that studying mode, but this time with a challenge of balancing my work life as well. I'm taking all the subjects in stage 2 since I don't want to drag it too long. I'm determined to make it to managerial level within the next 3 years. I find my work interesting since its a completely different industry I'm in; one which I never thought I'll enter. The aspect of marketing applies in a whole different way here. I should also say that my employer is a sought after company having a superb image among the public. I gel quite well with my team members as well.
I should make it a point to blog more often since there are so many things I want to put into words. But time is not always available in my case. On a more startling note, I had apparently said something about Ms. X to cause some ripples even though I was not in Malaysia. Talk about a shocker! I had to do damage control and fast since my reputation was at stake. It's a good thing that I had very trustworthy friends in Malaysia to depend on from miles away. Plus, I cared what she thought of me as a person. I wouldn't have known any of it if I hadn't chatted with Ms. Psychic on fb after donkey's years. I wonder how all my girls are doing in Malaysia?!?
Hey girls, if you're reading this do holler back, ok :D tc
I like going back to that studying mode, but this time with a challenge of balancing my work life as well. I'm taking all the subjects in stage 2 since I don't want to drag it too long. I'm determined to make it to managerial level within the next 3 years. I find my work interesting since its a completely different industry I'm in; one which I never thought I'll enter. The aspect of marketing applies in a whole different way here. I should also say that my employer is a sought after company having a superb image among the public. I gel quite well with my team members as well.
I should make it a point to blog more often since there are so many things I want to put into words. But time is not always available in my case. On a more startling note, I had apparently said something about Ms. X to cause some ripples even though I was not in Malaysia. Talk about a shocker! I had to do damage control and fast since my reputation was at stake. It's a good thing that I had very trustworthy friends in Malaysia to depend on from miles away. Plus, I cared what she thought of me as a person. I wouldn't have known any of it if I hadn't chatted with Ms. Psychic on fb after donkey's years. I wonder how all my girls are doing in Malaysia?!?
Hey girls, if you're reading this do holler back, ok :D tc
Monday, January 10, 2011
To start anew...
Thank God 2010 is over since it was beyond doubt my worst year- ever!! So, here's looking forward to better things this year. Although, I'm 10 days late in making a virtual new years' wish, like they say "better late than never".
And I have a lot of things to say about the past 9 days. Well, lets start fresh tomorrow.
And I have a lot of things to say about the past 9 days. Well, lets start fresh tomorrow.
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